I AM PROUDLY A BEAR

I am very disappointed! I went to celebrate, after work, my first month together with my JC. I don't know why, but he started to discard everything I said. I know that there are several things that he doesn’t like. But most of them are things that are important part of my life, and it seems that were important part of his life, but at some point he got disappointed and he started to hate them.
I know he have been helping me toast the bad parts and only keep the good ones, but last night I felt that I was loosing myself all together. Am I that bad? I don’t thinks so!! I love him, but I am what I am, and I will not give up myself. I do not want to be like him, I am myself. I want to be like myself, but stronger. He is not my roll model, and if he doesn’t like the bear stuff, good for him. I consider myself as a bear. I am very proud of be a bear and I will not going to change who I am or what I am, not even for him. He might have my heart, but is only my heart, not my mind, not my personality, and of course, NOT MY SOUL.

He is right, he is not ready to receive my heart. The problem is that I already give it to him. I can not put it back with out suffering, but I can put it in the fridge so it will not rote. I’m sure, I will not be as warm with him as I have been, but I don’t think he has appreciated what I have done for him. I know he is hurt and I promise to be a support for him. Sure, I will be a support, but if he can’t be my complementary part, I will be only that (a support). What I want in a relationship is something equal. Apparently he wants that too.

I’m tired, disappointed, and want to go home. I’m at work right now, and I discover I can update my blog from here. Lets see here it takes me. I already bought PEA just in case I need them. No more lovely bear from me. Nevertheless, I AM PROUDLY A BEAR.