All or nothing.

Why the title? I really don't know. It just came to my mind. I am a little scared. My friend D talked with the canaidan thief. He said lies, as usual. But the point is other. She asked me if I was gay. So far, I think I am not. One thing is sure. I like both, males and females. I use to think of myself as bisexual, but I'm not sure anymore. My straight friends talk about girls in a very intense way. The say way my gay friends talk about guys. I don't think in they way they do, so now I am just thinking I am asexual, but I am just looking for someone just because of imitation of the society.
The problem is not my sexuality, the problem is to accept myself whatever I am. She said something very wise. She said "if you want to walk in the watter, you have to get out of the boat", meaning I have to get out of my comfort zone. I think that my comfort zone is to pretend something I am not. What I am not is a regular guy, like the typical Mexican guy that loves two things: soccer and women.
I think of myself as a handicap person. I am not able to act in a sexually normal way (I'm including homosexuality and heterosexuality in the normal sexual way). That is the way I should see myself. I should accept myself as a big little kid.
This leads me to other thoughts. When I was a little kid, I choose a broken toy from the nice. Why was that? I didn't want to leave alone the one that I knew no one will choose. I think I grow in that way, and now I am nice with the broken people. I try to be nice with everyone, even the most evil, jerk, and asshole person. I have to learn to be a little more asshole myself.